the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
Randomize
