I'm jealous of your bromance
Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
Randomize
