You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
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