The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
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