So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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