I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Randomize
