So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize
