around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
Randomize
