I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
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