She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
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