if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
Randomize
