I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
Randomize
