I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
Randomize