Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
Randomize
