Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
Randomize
