mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
Randomize
