i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
It's 6 am and I've spent the last few hours searching for a cork screw or suitable substitute. You had none. Incidentally, I finally opened this bottle of wine, but owe you a new meat sticky thing with those two prongs. Sobriety is not good for me. Or your utensils.
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Randomize
