oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
Randomize
