Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
Randomize