Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
no. you can't hotbox the world.
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Randomize