So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
I woke up to a text that said, "I can see you but can't get in." It was the pizza delivery guy who saw me passed out drunk on the floor through the front door.
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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