she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
Randomize
