hey babe. i'll pick you up in my mom's car. with my mom. she has nothing to do tonight.
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
