I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
Randomize
