wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
Randomize
