i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
its liver damage thursday
Randomize