Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
Randomize
