2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
There are leaves in my underwear?
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