Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
Randomize