A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
Randomize