Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
New guy at the liquor store was inexplicably fascinated by our huge jug of williams. First he said what are you gonna mix THAT with? and looked confused when I said air.
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
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