I've blown a few things in my day
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
as a side note pls kill me
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
Randomize
