she sounds like chewbacca in bed
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Randomize
