Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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