Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Randomize
