Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
Randomize
