I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
Randomize
