Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
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