i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
Randomize