I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
i wanted to iron the shorts i'm wearing. but i'm high and lazy. so i'm using my hair straightener. in bed.
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
I'm in the grocery store cradling a box of wine like it's my firstborn, so of course this would be the first and only time I've ever seen my boss outside of the office.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
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