she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
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