I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
Randomize
