Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
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