did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
Randomize
