i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Randomize
