i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
