I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
God gave him joint rollers for hands
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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