whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
