I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize
