The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
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