let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
I overheard a kid saying to his mom at Walmart: "Mommy.. should we buy cups for daddy's spit?"
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
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